10 rules for dating my daughter application
Normally, I flip through the interwebs casually and inattentively. As you can probably tell from looking at the title, it's the Rules for Dating my Daughter meme that irritates the pacifist right out of me.
I read headlines, glance at cat pictures, and roll my eyes at religious and political stuff.
My son generally wears pants that cover his genitals. Really, I'm not sure why any of these "rules" bother me.
(REVOCABLE AT ANY TIME) NOTE – This application will be Incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor. BOY SCOUT RANK:_______________________________________ 5. HOME ADDRESS: ________________CITY: _________ ZIP ______ 6. Yes____ No_______ If NO, explain: ________________________________ 7.
If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is in the _____________ B.
When would be the best time to interview your father, mother, priest or pastor? Fill in the blanks: Please answer freely – all answers are confidential (That means I won’t tell anyone – I promise): A.
Every so often, I see a popular meme that irritates me so much that it jars me from my semi-conscious social media induced zombie state.
You can read more of her snarkasm on Petty Thoughts.
In 50 words or less, what does “DO NOT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER” mean to you? In 50 words or less, what does “ABSTINENCE” mean to you? When I first meet a girl, the first thing I notice is _____________________ (NOTE: If the answer to “E” begins with a B, T, or A, discontinue and leave the premises immediately with your head hung low.) 15. _____________________ Signature (That means sign your name) Thank you for your interest. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved.
If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my _____________ C. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is ____________________ E. Do you plan to attend a Catholic or Christian College? ____________ I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, AND RED HOT POKERS.