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16-Oct-2016 13:06

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Women are not objects except for the fact that they occupy time and space. However I’m a writer, and I’m a bit cynical, like a lot of my favourite authors, so when something bothers me I’m going to write about it.But there is a lot more to life than chasing girls. And we’re pretty clueless when it comes to attracting, and keeping you. I decided a long time ago I would not pursue any women that I did not want to see more than once.The pattern’s repeated on vampersonals.com, a dating site specifically for… This site is a goldmine, even if just for the information it throws up – did you know there are 200+ vampire ladies in Norfolk looking for love? That’s a lot of horny vampires just sitting around online right now. Filling out a Vampersonals profile is slightly tougher than expected. On ldspals.com, a dating site for Mormons, I only have to mention my quest for a wholesome marriage partner to be swamped with hits.

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They also have a section where you can make your preference for the race of your partner clear – which creeps me out a little but also makes me wonder, exactly how many Native American Goths Still, beyond the dodgy profile pictures and ‘inventive’ profile names (pagan_princess, anyone? I still get hits, even though in my profile I profess to a drinking problem and state that I’m more into dressing up than having any actual investment in goth culture. Obviously not, though – they just want to wink at the model in my user-picture, really. If you see any images on our site which you believe belong to yourself or another and we have incorrectly used it please let us know at [email protected] we will respond asap.

There’s a misconception that this is a blog about how to get laid by numerous, soulless bodies. Women have passions, dreams, ambitions, philosophies and talents. And if men need help meeting women, I’m going to help them.

And a drop-down list to determine what “goth type” you are (I’m a Glam Goth. The market for diaperdating.com, a site for people who need (or just like) to wear diapers, is a little harder to tap into, but I get there. Or anything they can get really, just please call one of them soon because they don’t have a lot of time left.

I didn’t actually know that Glam Goths existed, before now, but I am so glad that they do). In a fit of desperation I even create a profile on uk professing to ‘have ties’ with the BNP, but I still get messages from nice, normal guys looking for friendship and maybe more. Obviously I’m not going to find the perfect guy on here. Tons and tons of them, stretching pages and pages back into the internet, and all of them looking for love. Don't Panic attempt to credit photographers and content owners wherever possible, however due to the sheer size and nature of the internet this is sometimes impractical or impossible.

They’ve sped up the business of finding a partner for a lot of people over the last few years, and their popularity is ever increasing.So in an attempt to take a peek into this growing obsession (and maybe to find a perfect partner of my own), I braved the murky backwaters of the dating site world in a fearless search for Mr Match. It is a dating site for ugly people – or as the front page itself puts it, “the aesthetically challenged.” Setting up a profile here took about three minutes, and two minutes after that I’d received five page views and a wink from James, a 43 year old from Kent who is “looking for romance.” And yes, he is quite ugly. Two days later, I’ve got 35 private messages and 38 winks at my profile – even though I don’t have a picture and I haven’t been able to fill in my details.