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“Unless it’s a breathtaking, magical experience, we’re not giving enough of the ‘maybes’ a chance.” There are a number of reasons why a relationship might fail to flourish after the first date.There are the obvious faux pas, such as bragging, drinking too much or talking about your ex.“When you find a potential match, you’re excited and your expectations are high,” he said.“When you meet that person and those expectations aren’t met, that’s frustrating and then you don’t want to waste your time.” While there are no doubt instances of bait-and-switch online, Twin Cities dating coach Kimberly Koehler said that many first dates fail because of the human tendency to believe what we want to be true when given incomplete information.“First dates are easy to get,” said Lauren Fogel, a psychologist and certified sex therapist for Allina Health Nicollet Mall Clinic, but landing a second “is a mark of triumph.” Combine busy schedules, a need for instant gratification and the ever-replenishing well of the Internet, and it’s no wonder that many daters prefer to keep their options open.“When it’s so accessible like that, it gives the perception that there’s always something better out there,” Fogel said.
But other, less transparent missteps can be just as damaging.
Set up for disappointment David Konopacz is fed up with online dating, saying he often feels he’s been duped once he meets a woman face-to-face. Paul luxury car salesman admits that the “thrill of the chase” usually ends in disappointment.