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Before I go any further, you should take a moment to be grateful that you are with a man that has enough of a life and enough security in his value that he doesn’t need to try and please you all the time. Now, here’s a major, major point in terms of understanding men: In the context of relationships, men do not think in terms of “little things”. I’m not saying that I don’t appreciate the little things, but I would much rather have a single mind-blowing, unforgettable experience with the girl I’m with rather than 100 “little things”.
To use an analogy: one amazing time with a woman could equal 10,000 “points”, whereas 100 little things might only equal 10 points.
You would take the behavior for granted and you wouldn’t place much value on it.
You wouldn’t be able to respect him or trust his strength because everything he was doing is based on trying to “win you over”, get your approval or please you.
This should be a relief to you since it means that you could have a tremendous positive impact on your relationship just with one night of making your guy feel amazing instead of spending countless hours doing “little things”.
I have made it very obvious to my significant other how much I love it when he texts or does “little things” for me.
even though he rarely does it, I’ve let him know that just a simple email or text can make my day.
You want him to do X, but if you tell him to do X it ruins it because then he would be doing it because you told him to and not because his emotions/love for you told him to.Then you say: He should know to do it, I shouldn’t have to tell him.And we don’t value what is just handed to us nearly as much.Think about it: If he was some guy who was obsessed with trying to please you constantly in every way, you would think he was a pushover.
And you also say: When he does what I like, I tell him how much I like it. So first off, you want him to do “the little things” because they make you feel amazing when he does them. They feel amazing because he’s the type of man that has more going for himself than just trying to please you constantly.His attention is valuable because he doesn’t just give it away freely and carelessly. People tend to put value on that which is rare and that which they have to work for- not just in relationships but in all aspects of life.